The Gift That Keeps On Giving Till It Kills You 11 & 12

Months eleven and twelve kind of got past me. Now it's month thirteen, and I have no more ice cream coming to me. Plenty of ice cream still in the freezer, but no more on the way. As I reflect on the final months and experience altogether I will say I am thankful I got to try all the (mostly) tasty and (absolutely) creative flavors, and I am very grateful it's all over. The final two months had some weirdo flavors, some also-rans, and some of my top 5 picks for the year. I'm very grateful for the very kind gift my brother and sister-in-law provided me and Liz (and our vegan friends), and it's definitely a gift we will be remembering and likely talking about for a very long time. Now I just need to find where I can get some more butter ice cream....

- Jack o'Lantern Pumpkin Bread

Scott: I vaguely remember trying this. I do not remember what it tasted like.

*shrug*/10

Liz: Yeah, it wasn't bad, but wasn't a standout.

5/10 

 

- The Great Candycopia

Scott: Like a Skor bar, but better. And I like Skor bars.

9.5/10

Liz: I also Skor bars.

6/10 

 

- Creepy Crawly Critters

Scott: I had bugs once. Didn't feel a need to eat them again. Or combine them with matcha.

pass/10

Liz: So far I have tried a tiny taste of the matcha (good) and avoided the bugs. I'm afraid of the bugs, but not willing to throw out matcha ice cream.

?/10 

 

- Double Bubble Toil & Trouble (v)

Scott: Why gum? I do not wish to eat gum.

pass/10

Liz: Better than I expected for a vegan bubble gum flavor.

4/10

 

- Black Cat Licorice & Lavender

Scott: Creative, tasty, interesting pairing, I would definitely eat it again. When I want to eat black licorice again at least.

9/10

Liz: I liked it very much. Enjoyed the licorice reservoirs, but I wish they were more distributed. I liked the lavender base. I knew I liked both of these flavors, but the combo was a pleasant surprise. One of my top picks for the year.

9/10 

 

- Caramelized Turkey & Cranberry Sauce

Scott: It's Thanksgiving, but with a lot more cranberry.

5/10

Liz: Savory. Peppery. Just not flavors I am looking for in an ice cream. It's not even the meat. The other flavors. I'd rather eat cranberry jelly.

2/10 +1 for bold decision

 

- Sweet Potato Pie w/ Double Baked Almond Streusel

Scott: I feel like I've eaten this Salt & Straw flavor a half dozen times now.

6 probably/10

Liz: A mellow pumpkin spice.

7/10 

 

- Candied Walnut Cheesecake

Scott: Tastes a bit like a bran cereal that just happens to have 400% of your saturated fat for the day.

5/10

Liz: It has a sort of funny taste to it. Maybe the bitterness of the walnuts? Also a subtle cheesecake flavor.

4/10

 

- Parker House Rolls with Salted Buttercream

Scott: It's bread and butter. With just the right amount of crumbly biscuit mixed in. And I cannot stop eating it. MORE BUTTER!

9.5/10

Liz: Decent. I liked the chunks of bread, but I didn't have the same passion for it you did.

6-7/10

 - Pumpkin & Gingersnap Pie (v)

Scott: It's pumpkin pie filling.

6/10

Liz: One of the best vegan flavors we've had. Pumpkiny. Creamy. 

7/10

 

 The end! Or maybe we'll do a Top 5 Year in Review. Or maybe we'll never eat ice cream again. To be (possibly) continued....

 

The Gift That Keeps On Giving Till It Kills You 10

Month ten was booze-themed. Only in the sense that everything had a booze-y name. All the adult-beverage-related flavors were in such tiny doses so as to be homeopathic and if given a hundred guesses I'd guess banana peppers before I'd guess hops in some of these. Our pet sitter ate half of 'em before I got to try 'em, but given the price of pet sitters these days I think I got the better end of the deal.

 

- Great Nation's Mellifluous Strawberry & Guava Smoothie Sour

Scott: There's not a whole lot to this ice cream. It's mostly just strawberry and consonants. And, yet, I love it. I love you ice cream. I really do. Will you marry me?

9.5/10

Liz: A pleasant strawberry ice cream.

6.5/10

 

- Reverend Nat's St. Citron Margarita Sherbet

Scott: Kind of boring and vaguely citrus.

6/10

Liz: The first citrus flavor of the year. Smooth and bingeable.

7.5/10 

 

- Modern Times' Nola Coffee Stout -

Scott: None for me.

X/10

Liz: I remember liking it.

7.5/10

 

- Breakside Brewery’s Half & Half Crunch

Scott: Really good chocolate. Really good crunchy stuff. Really really miss it.

9.5/10

Liz: Kind of just a chocolate with crunchies.

6/10

 - Wynwood Brewing Mango Habanero IPA Sorbet (v)

This was a repeat. Why are they wasting our time! And again I ask who wants habanero in their dessert??

The Gift That Keeps On Giving Till It Kills You 9

Month nine was "camping" themed. I guess we've eaten too much ice cream at this point because I have to say I thought it was kind of uninspired. Bacon in this. S'more something something. Fruity mix sorbet. Coffee. Month summarized. 

 Except for the Muddy Buddies. Woah, that was a curve ball that hit the batter.

 

- Maple Bacon Streusel

Scott: Kind of a caramel maple flavor with bits of bacon in it. Not bad by any means, but not great either. Just maple and bacon in ice cream.

7.510

Liz: Tastes kind of like a breakfast-y bacon-y waffle-y -- like one of those waffles with the maple cooked into it.

7/10 -4 for bacon

 

- Bug Juice Sorbet

Scott: A tasty fruit punch flavor. Best enjoyed in a smoothie, though.

6/10

Liz: Kind of a boring fruit punch flavor. Gave it to the vegans.

3/10 

 

- Salted Hazelnut Praline S'mores -

Scott: More hazelnut than s'more for sure. Marshmallows were there, but kind of secretly blended-in in a way that I would probably not have guessed they were there. Chocolate was present in the form of random blobs and graham cracker in what I guess was cookie dough. It was good, but no s'more.

7/10

Liz: A bit heavy on the hazelnut for my taste. I'm not seeing any marshmallow... found a chunk of something... <editor's note: turned out to be a dough chunk> good chocolate ganache...

5/10

 

- Cowboy Coffee Grinds & Bourbon

Scott: It's coffee flavor so it's good. That's it.

6.5/10

Liz: A decently flavorful coffee base with brownie chunks that were good. Nothing that would put this ice cream shop on the map, but a solid flavor I wouldn't mind munching on the couch. Addendum: the chocolate ganache reservoirs were better than the brownie chunks.

6.5/10 + 1 for stuffing a ganache torte in there

 - Mushroom Muddy Buddies

Scott: Weird with a hint of peanut butter. And maybe dirt.

?/10

Liz: Hmm... that's odd. If there are muddy buddies they are pulverized very tiny. I don't think I would have identified it as mushroom. But I guess there's an umami flavor. I don't know. I don't think it's for me.

3/10

The Gift That Keeps On Giving Till It Kills You 8

Month eight was all about the berries. Only one with raspberries and none with strawberries, Nature's two best berries, but thankfully all berries are good berries. Don't have much else to say except.... it was an acceptable month? Liz edit: this was a good month for a deep bench of solid contenders (except the habanero). Berries in ice cream won't surprise anyone, but they're old reliable for a reason.

 

- Wild-Foraged Berry Slab Pie

Scott: Nothing exciting, but very pleasing. Had a good berry mix and the occasional crusty pieces were nice and not too big. Satisfying. Ahhhhh.

7.5/10

Liz: Pretty conventional berries and cream flavor. I like the way the berries are mixed in.

6.5/10 

 

- Besharam's Yogurt Lassi with Raspberry

Scott: Kind of weird slightly sour unsettling taste.

4/10

Liz: Little bit of tartness, but not otherwise super different from Wild Berry Pie. It supposedly has cumin and cardamom, but I don't taste any of them. I definitely like the frozen yogurt vibe better than Scooter does.

6.5/10 

 

- Boysenberry Oatmilk Sherbet

Scott: I'll be honest. I haven't gotten to this one yet. After eating 100 ice creams another sherbet isn't high on my to do list.

?/10

Liz: Mmmm. Tastes like a creamy sorbet. Oh yeah. Nice potent berry flavor.

7/10

 

- Birthday Cakes & Blackberries

Scott: Very good. The sweet creamy birthday cake base combined with the whatever it was that was mixed in it was delicious. The blackberry jam was of course a tremendous vein that dominated its portion of the ice cream container, but if apportioned appropriately it was a tasty accompaniment to the rest of the mix.

7.5/10

Liz: Maybe there're chunks of something in here, but it mostly just tastes like sweet cream to me.

 6/10 (-0.5 for giant lake of stuff)

 Note: the creamy, rainbow sprinkle base grew one me: 6.5/10

 - Goat Cheese Marionberry Habanero

Scott: A really unique ice cream I would recommend everyone try, and if offered a scoop I would eat it, but I don't think I would buy it. The post-fruit and cheese spicy kick while interesting was just, like, "Why?" I don't turn to ice cream to satisfy my pepper fix just like I don't turn to lunch and dinner for my ice cream fix. Stay in your lane Salt & Straw!

6.5/10

Liz: Oooh that's too much heat. That's a lot of heat. I can taste more habanero than goat cheese or marionberry.

1/10

The Gift That Keeps on Giving Till it Kills You 7

Month seven brought the literary flavors. A group of flavors that were impossible to remember because their names were meaningless, but a group of flavors that despite their wasted breath were surprisingly delicious. In fact, this has been my favorite month to date. These flavors were supposed to be inspired by favorite childrens authors, but I saw no "Jim Davis: I Hate Mondays." Perhaps I just led an uncultured and uncivilized youth. Whichever the case, whatever the reason for their creation, these were the ice creams that came closest to usurping Americone Dream. 

Postscript: due to editorial neglect the contribution of Guest Writer Liz was not solicited until the monthly ice creams had been long since consumed. A generous off the cuff interview was provided to fill the gaps, but any lack of wit or wisdom are strictly the fault of the editorial staff.

 

- Smile: Words & Pictures

Scott: After reading the name I, of course, had no idea what this was going to taste like. It tasted, however, like creamy, spongy, Italian heaven. The almond infused sponge cake gave it a pleasant flavor and unique texture unlike most ice creams I've had while the bits of chocolate offered a striking and enjoyable contrast in both taste and substance. It was all well mixed and evenly distributed such that every bite was a delicious one.

9/10

Liz: The sponge cake didn't do much for me. I liked the stracciatella. Saved it from having an even lower score.

5/10 

 

- Geronimo Stilton & The Salted Frozen Feast

Scott: After reading the name I, of course, had no idea what this was going to taste like. The ingredient list seemed to primarily consist of cheese. It was a salty delight that grew on me the more I ate. The Ritz-like crackers sounded insane, but I must now confess it was insanely genius.

8.5/10

Liz: Points for unique flavor profile. The salty parmesan-y was unexpected but not unappreciated. Not sure I would buy it regularly but I enjoyed it.

7.5/10 

 

- Amulet: Fruit of the Gaboda Tree

Scott: After reading the name I, of course, had no idea what this was going to taste like. It was fine. The "gaboda" fruits were small and tasty, but swimming in a much larger sea of a nice but largely unremarkable creamy base. The alleged cocoa nibs I think maybe I could appreciate, but maybe I'm just suggestible. I think it was fine.

6.5/10

Liz: I don't even remember what that one wasted like. Wasn't it like, a boring vanilla background with little flecks of passion fruit? I guess I never really got into that one.

4/10

 

- Twins: A Matching Pear With Cinnamon Swirl

Scott: After reading the name I assumed there was a book called Matching Pear With Cinnamon Swirl that I had missed out on as a child, but, already uninterested in the theme and not willing to google it, I moved straight on to tasting. It was a relatively simple flavor, but also a simply delicious one. A very satisfying cinnamon pear with a subtle cream cheesy creaminess. There are a lot of fruity desserts out there; this is one of the few I can recall ever having that was pear-based. It is unique enough that I would definitely seek it out again.

8.5/10

Liz: I liked it because I don't think I've ever had pear ice cream. Also had that gooey sweat cinnamon cream cheesy swirl so I liked both the base and the swirl in. It was pretty good.

8/10

 

- Goosebumps: Monster Blood is Back!

Scott: After reading the name I, of course, had no idea what this was going to taste like, but I knew it was going to be crazy. And it didn't disappoint. The glow-in-the-dark-green monster blood was crazy. The crunchy red strawberry bark fangs were crazy. The whole thing, straight ice cream crazy. It wasn't necessarily the best ice cream I've ever had -- the monster blood in particular was a bit heavy on the pineapple juice -- but it was the craziest. I would recommend everyone try it. And then order some Smile: Words & Pictures. :)

8/10

Liz: The salted mango base was unusual but good. The nuclear green syrup was visually offensive but tasty. The strawberry bark fangs, eh, I could go either way. I think they added some nice texture.

 4/10 (+2 if eyes closed)

 

The Gift That Keeps On Giving Till It Kills You 6

Month six brought the floral flavors, a very unique combination of flavors based on flowers and flower byproducts. Receipt of the ice creams was delayed briefly first in transit and then in reshipment after the initially delayed shipment turned into ice cream soup as ice cream is want to do if given enough time out of a freezer. It was nevertheless a winner and Liz's favorite batch to date. It was probably our mailman's least favorite, however, judging by our door cam's video. Ice cream soup is very leaky and very sticky. 

- Rhubarb Crumble with Toasted Anise

Scott: Surprisingly good. The anise flavor was subtle, but pleasant. The rhubarb was tart, but not too tart. The crumbles were nicely sized, textured, and fairly well mixed. Aside from the rhubarb being a giant glob like most Salt & Straw syrups, needing to be manually apportioned to prevent rhubarb toxicity, it was a well made ice cream.

7/10

Liz: The veins of rhubarb have great tart flavor. Wish they were distributed more evenly. The anise is good, but subtle.

8/10 

 

- Wildflower Honey with Ricotta Walnut Lace Cookies

Scott: Despite its complicated name, it is somehow the most boring of flavors. Even its crumbles are like a very boring, slightly soggy cereal. Only flavor I can truly distinguish is lemon which I am assuming is the lemon zest. Ingredient number twelve or so. What happened to the other eleven flavors??

4/10

Liz: Kind of boring.

4/10 

 

- Honey Lavender

Scott: Very good. Very purple. Unique. Yet somehow not particularly impressive. Except for its purple-ness. It was very purple.

7/10

Liz: Very distinct and bold flavor. This one I would buy.

 8.5/10 

 

- Jasmine Milk Tea & Chocolate

Scott: Quite nice. I enjoyed the tea-flavored ice cream, and the chocolate almonds bits were a nice complement that weren't too large like many Salt & Straw flavors. Overall very satisfying.

8/10

Liz: Very promising, but the jasmine flavor could have been stronger and the almonds don't add much.

7/10

- Mathilde's Hibiscus & Coconut Sherbert (vegan)

Scott: A hard to describe experience. Like eating perfume, but in a good way. Also makes a most delicious base for a smoothie. I'd order that smoothie.

6/10

Liz: Pleasantly tart with a creamy finish.

7/10

The Gift That Keeps On Giving TIll It Kills You 5

Month five brought the long lost and feared missing cereal bowl specials. Five new flavors based on childhood cereal favorites -- corn flakes excluded. They were a good batch overall though I must admit the inclusion of the worst of the Captain Crunches was disappointing. I think a good Corn Pops or Honeycomb ice cream could be good. As long as they don't bring back that computer animated manic chihuahua thing. Jeez, what the hell was that??

 

- Off Limits Dash Cold Brew Cocoa Crisps

Scott: I don't really have much to say about this one. It was good. I'll just second what Liz said.

6/10

Liz: Standard coffee, but I like the chocolate swirl.

6/10 

 

 - Peanut Butter Captain Crunch (vegan)

Scott: Ain't ever going to eat no stinkin' peanut butter ice cream.

0/10

Liz: Peanut butter with a bit of a crunch. Kind of boring.

5/10 

 

- Corn Flake Cookies with Merrionberry Jam

Scott: I'll just be honest. I don't want jam in my ice cream. Does anybody?

Nope/10

Liz: Like a plain vanilla with a little bit of cookie any a few big veins of jelly. I like the jelly. Wish it was mixed in a little better. Mmm... 5.

 5/10 

 

- Snap Crackle Marshmallow Treats

Scott: Tasty base. Kind of creamy marshmallowy and yummy. Rice crispies themselves were more kind of like, "oh, huh? interesting." But, oh, that base!

8.5/10

Liz: Alright the base is good, tastes like milk at the bottom of the cereal bowl. [Editors note: yuck]. Has some rice crispies that are more chewy than crunchy. It's ok, something a little different. 

5.5/10

- Pots of Golden Rainbows

Scott: I liked the Lucky Charm marshmallows except when there were too many Lucky Charm marshmallows when I was, like, "woah! Marshmallows!"

8.5/10

Liz: Also has that milky bottom of the cereal bowl base. [Editors note: still yuck]. I like the colors. The marshmallow treats still have the flavor I remember, but not the melt in your mouth texture that I remember. It's good.

7/10